Wayne's Advice To Teens


1st Question: Can I always trust my older friends? Answer: No. I once saw an older friend of mine chewing on a live 22 bullet. I thought it might be dangerous and asked him if it was safe to do that. He assured me it was safe. So like a true idiot I also began to chew on a live 22 bullet in class in High School. At some point in time I secured a 22 bullet to my dad's bench mounted vice and tapped the end of the bullet with a hammer. This resulted in a huge noise and fire like a rocket coming out the end of the bullet. Glad that didn't happen when I was chewing on a bullet. Carefully consider the possible consequencies instead of blindly following anyone.
2nd Question: Are some laws suspended say on Halloween? Answer: No. Now I won't tell you what laws I broke during my Senior year in High School on Halloween. Let's just say God must have had his angels very busy that Halloween night keeping me out of trouble. In hind sight I now realize all laws are always in effect no matter what holiday it is.
3rd Question: Do I really need to bath daily and use deodorant? Answer: Yes. I grew up on a farm with lots of farm animals. I also had a clogged nose from lots of colds. So I couldn't smell anything. However, others could smell me. Everyone constantly sheds lots of skin daily. Everyone also eliminates lots of toxins under their arm pits, etc. So it's really important to wash your whole body daily with soap and water. Deodorant will help you to smell better also. I am allergic to most deodorants. If you are also, just ask your doctor, etc., for help, and keep trying different ones until you find one that your not allergic to. Turns out I can use Mitchum Gel Anti-Perspirant & Deodorant. I now use Tom's no aluminum natural 24 hr odor protection long lasting dedorant. A nice smelling cologne might help you smell better also but is no substite for a daily bath or shower. Shaving your arm pits can also help get rid of smelly bacteria that reside in your arm pit hair.
4th Question: How can I decide if I want to drink alcohol, smoke, or use drugs: Answer: I made a list of all the reasons I could think of to drink alcohol on one page. Then on another page I made of list of all the reasons I could think of to not drink alcohol. Why don't you do the same? My list of reasons to drink alcohol was very short while my list of reasons to not drink was very long. So I decided to never drink alcohol. I knew if I never drank any alcohol I could never become an alcoholic, I could never end up in prison for something I had done because I was drunk. I could never kill a family because I was driving drunk. You could also make the same type of lists to decide if you want to smoke or do drugs. Here are some Bible verses to help you decide. Proverbs 20:1 21:17 23:29-35. 1 Thessalonians 5:22 1 Corinthians 6:19.
By the way, Copyrighted 2015 to 2017 by Wayne Mckellips. Last updated 9/25/2017. Please copy and share but don't sell. You do not have permission to mirror this article or site on the internet.
5th Question: How far should I go when I'm dating? Answer: When I was dating I kissed but I didn't do roaming hands, nakedness, sex of any kind, etc. If I had it to do again I wouldn't even kiss, on the lips, until I was married. Why? Because kissing especially french kissing (tongue inside the other person's mouth) is used in marriage as a warm up to sex. I'm not saying kissing is sinful. My thought is if you don't start something nothing will happen. If you try to get as close as you can to having sex without actually having sex chances are very high you'll get so excited you'll end up going all the way because it will be extremely hard to stop. So for me I would hold hands and hug but I wouldn't kiss on the lips. I would also let my date when appropriate know my standards and why. I know, a lot of people won't want to date you if you won't kiss. At first, I myself thought not kissing was a crazy idea. But then I read the book, "I kissed Dating Goodby" by Joshua Harris and came to agree with the author. But you will have to decide for yourself how far you want to go when dating.
6th Question: Do I really need to brush my teeth and floss daily? Answer: Only if you don't want to have bad breath and lose all your teeth. I think I had already lost four permament teeth before I learned to brush my teeth especially on the gum line and floss daily. It seems the teeth become loose from the gums, get infected and fall out. That's one reason flossing daily is so important. Also I brush with a vibrating tooth brush like the Sonic Care tooth brush. It vibrates back and forth many times per second. Vibrating so fast enables the vibrating tooth brush to clean the teeth in between the teeth much better than one could do with a manual tooth brush. I also floss daily. I now use disposable dental floss picks. I couldn't understand how to floss correctly until I joined the navy. So if your having problems flossing ask your dentist for help or instructions.
7th Question: Is it okay to view pornography? Answer: Viewing pornography is progressively addictive. That is, the more you see, the more you want to see. Why is that? Turns out in response to increased dopamine levels the brain increases nural connections and Delta Fos B in specific brain cells for different specific addictive behaviors. So as one becomes more addicted to say crack or porn only more crack or porn will cause Delta Fos B to be released to the brain cells craving it. Then those brains cells will be satisfied for a short while. But the next time they'll need more crack or more porn to be satisfied. That's why porn is said to be progressively addictive. Viewing porn expecially high speed internet porn can become so addictive that a couple may find it impossible to have successful sex with each other. The cure? A complete withdrawal from porn. It will probably take 8 or more weeks with no viewing of porn to reduce DeltaFosB levels down to where the brain can behave like it did prior to view porn. More I've written on the subject.
8th Question: Is it okay to masturbate? Answer: I believe it is (by yourself) but be careful of your thoughts. Why? Because we tend to do what we think. So if your thinking about how things might be after you get married and your having sex, I don't see a probem. However, if your thinking about having sex outside of marriage that could easily lead to sex outside of marriage. Mathew 5:27-28. Masturbation can certainly give one a quick release from sexual desire and tension. Remember to stay away from porn. You can read more I've written on the subject.
9th Question: How can I get relief from my great depression? Answer: Great depression can be caused by different things. Including terrible circumstances, poor nutrition, incorrect thoughts, brain injuries or diseases, chemical imbalances in the brain, etc. I myself dealt with great depression when I was young. Realize life has its ups and downs. Even though it may seem your in a dark tunnel and there is no light and no way out, there is hope. Eventually things will get better. First, talk to your parents, teachers, school counselors, doctor, preacher, etc., and tell them how you feel. Keep talking until someone listens to you. Educate yourself on depression. Its causes and cures. Read "Change Your Brain Change Your Life" by Daniel Amen, M.D. Surround yourself with positive friends. Read positive thinking books. Don't even consider suicide. When I was young I seriously considered suicide. I thank God regularly I didn't take that option. My son and daughter and grandkids wouldn't be here if I had committed suicide. I would not have been able to help the people I've been able to help during my life. I believe suicide would not have given me relief instead it would have brought me to a worse state. Angie Renimore and Tamara Laroux tell what happened to them after they committed suicide. If the doctor gives you medicine take it as prescribed. Report back to the doctor and your parents regularly how the medicine is affecting you. Be an active participant in your healthcare. Eat healthy. Make sure you get all your B complex vitamins. Educate yourself on good nutrition. Exercise daily. Check your thoughts. If they are not constructive and positive work on fixing them. Follow Philippians 4:4-8. Try to get at least eight hours of sleep a night. Try to do something nice for at least one other person every day. The books "Reality Therapy" by Dr. William Glasser, "Misbelief Therapy" or "Telling Yourself the Truth" by William Backus and "The Road Less Traveled" by Dr Scott Peck also helped me and may help you. This article of mine may also help you. Don't give up until you get the relief you need. Please also read the 11th question and answer.
10th Question: How Can I get closer to God? Answer: Let me ask you a question. Do you believe Jesus, God's son, left heaven and was born of the virgin Mary. Lived a sinless life on this earth then died on the cross for the sins of the world. Then rose physically from the tomb alive. Rose into heaven and is coming back again? If you do and you want Jesus to be your Savior and Master just in prayer right now ask Him to be your Savior, to wash you clean of all your sins with his blood and to be the Lord of your life from now on. Also ask him to fill you with his Holy Spirit. Tell him you want the fruits and gifts of the Holy Spirit. If you've done that and you mean it then your a Christian. Jesus is your Savior and Lord no matter how your feeling. Romans 10:9-13. Now, how can you get closer to God. It helps us get closer to God if we know what He says. I suggest you read the entire Bible. Start with the New Testament. After you've read it then read the Old Testament. Then keep reading and studing the Bible as you go through life. Daily spend time dancing before God and singing praises and thanksgivings to Him. Psalms 100:1-4. 2 Samuel 6:16. Psalms 149:3. Psalms 150:4. Find out Yahwah's various names and their meanings. Then sing praises to Him using those names and meanings. Daily also bring your requests and petitions for yourself and others before God the Father through Jesus, God the Son. 1 Timothy 2:5. Attend a good Bible believing, teaching, and practicing church regularly. Worship God sincerely privately and with others. Share your faith in Jesus with others. As a believer in Jesus, if you haven't yet been baptized by immersion in water in Jesus name or the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit, request it. If you want to, and with your parents permission, you might want to do some water fasting. Water fasting is where you don't eat any food but you do drink water. You spend time dancing and singing praises and thanksgivings to God and bringing specific requests and petitions to Him. If you decide to water fast, make sure to get your parents permission first. Also read some articles and perhaps books on fasting. Obey God. Abstain from every appearance of evil. John 14:23. 1 John 2:4. 1 Thessalonians 5:22. Matthew 7:21.
11th Question: What else can help me overcome temptations? Answer: In the name of Jesus rebuke any evil spirits of 1st) inferiority or 2nd) insecurity that might be troubling you. 1st) In God's eyes you are very valuable. You are created in His image. You are so valuable that Jesus left his home in heaven and came here to suffer greatly and die for you on the cross. Romans 5:8. John 3:16. Your value does not depend on how smart you are, or how athletic you are, or how popular you are, or how good looking you are. Your value depends on who you are. You are a human being, created in God's image. 2nd) If your trusting in Jesus as your Savior and Master, you are a child of God. So no one and nothing can ever seperate you from God. Romans 8:35-39. Psalms 91. 1st John 4:4. Mathew 28:20. You are secure in the arms of God. You are also very valuable in God's eyes. After you have rebuked and in the name of Jesus told any evil spirits of insecurity and or inferiority to leave you alone. Then do the same with any other evil spirits that might be bothering you. Always cover yourself with the blood of Jesus. Sing outloud, loudly even, thanking God for the cleansing blood of Jesus. Evil spirits can't stand it when we do that! Ask God daily to fill you with the Holy Spirit. Read, study and memorize God's word. Daily sing praises and thanksgivings, and bring your requests and petitions to God. Share with others what Jesus has done for you. Also be helpful to others. Exercise John 14:12-14.
12th Question: What should I do after High School? Answer: That's another good question. It took me a long time to realize its better to have a marketable skill than to be a Jack of all trades. It does cost money to live. It's also better to do something you enjoy than something you dislike. But one must sometimes do work they dislike at times, to pay the bills. College, Trade school, the military, OJT (On the Job Training), Job Core, etc., can often equip a person with a marketable job skill. Pray and ask God what He wants you to do. Seek advice from your parents, counselors, books, and mature Christians. Electricians, Plumbers, Sales people, etc., sometimes make more money than people with college degrees. But, if you want to be a Medical Doctor, or a Nurse, etc., you will need a college degree.
13th Question: How old should I be before I get married? Answer: It depends. Realize people tend to change as they get older. You will change and so will your beloved, sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worst. You should be happy and content with yourself. Please don't count on someone else to make you happy if your not already happy and content. Realize conflict can be good if it is handled in a good way. If there is no conflict in a close relationship that probably means someone is always giving in and may one day explode. Are you working and paying your own bills? Have you lived on your own? Is the other person responsible? Do they work and pay their own bills? How do they treat others? How do they treat their parents? How is their relationship with God? Do they encourage you in your relationship with God? Are you both willing to seek and receive counseling from mature Christians or counselors? Have you made a list and talked about everything you can think of? Have you read and discussed books on conflict resolution and how to have a good marriage? Never, marry someone thinking you can change them for the better. You may be able to change yourself but not someone else. What do your parents or mature Christian friends advise you? Remember to pray and seek God's will in this.
14th Question: If I'm a Christian, what will happen to me after I die? Answer: You will return to God from where you came. Ecclesiastes 12:7. Then you will undergo a judgement or life review. Hebrews 9:27. You may quickly see your life from birth to death. You may see not only your actions, thoughts and feelings but also experience how your words and actions affected others. God may well ask you, "What did you do for me? Did you tell others about me? Did you read my word? Did you spend time with me? Did you help others? If you are trusting in Jesus as your savior and King you will certainly be saved but its quite probable the amount of rewards you have in heaven will depend on how your life review goes. Many may well feel they wasted their life and end up in a storage type shed in heaven with other nominal believers. A few will hear the "well done" of Jesus and live in a nice mansion with lots of freedom in heaven. How it ends up for you is up to you. God knows you and still loves you. He wants a close relationship with you. I hope you will read His word, spend time with Him, and seek and allow the Holy Spirit to live in and through you as you become the hands and feet of Jesus and you draw closer to Jesus.
15) Is it okay to teast others? No! When someone is teasted almost always or always their feelings are hurt. We are to treat people the way we want to be treated. Before you say something to someone I encourage you to imagine how you might feel if you were in their situation and someone said that to you.
16) Is it okay to tell someone what to do if you don't have authority over them? No! I encourage you to imagine how you feel when somone with no authority over you tells you what to do. Suggestions or ideas are different than orders.
17) How should I treat others? I think everyone wants to be treated with respect. If we treat others with respect even when they treat us badly, I believe they will take notice and wonder why we treat them with respect regardless of how they treat others. Our kind behavior may influence them to treat us better. We also don't become someone's doormat because we also treat ourselves with respect.
18) What is a good way to handle conflict with another person? First, if possible, try to talk to them one on one without others around, when both of you are calm. If that doesn't work you may need to ask for help from others in authority or you may need to agree to disagree.
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